Rightsizing to our Retirement Dream Home

May 6, 2025

Rightsizing to our retirement dream home

In 2005 my wife was diagnosed with a terminal illness and given 4-5 years, and I became her full time caregiver. At the time I was the President and CEO of a National Investment Firm with 700+ Financial Advisor’s based in Omaha, NE. In 2006 at age 59 I decided to retire and move to San Diego to focus on my wife’s health out of the snow and enjoy your wonderful weather.  To be sure this is where we wanted to live, I leased a home in Olivenhain for $4,500 a month.  After three years without snow and below 0 degrees in the winter we began looking for our Retirement Dream home.   

In 2009 I purchased a home in the Aviara section of Carlsbad. My intention was to pay cash since we did well on the sale of our home in Omaha.  After I made an offer Wells Fargo Mortgage called me and suggested in lieu of paying cash I may want to consider a new product “Reverse for Purchase”, frankly, I was hesitant about Reverse Mortgages of any kind.  After providing me with an overview of the product I decided to take an in-depth look as a CFP .


When I confirmed the following facts, The loan was non-recourse and that I only had to make a 40% down payment. Have no mortgage payments for as long as I lived in the home and keep the 60% working for me in the market.  I did have to pay the Real Estate Taxes and Homeowners insurance. I moved forward with the Reverse for Purchase. 


The home needed extensive work to accommodate my wife’s disability, so I spent $150,000 out of pocket on the remodel. In 2012 the value of the home had increased substantially, I refinanced the home with a new Reverse Mortgage at a lower fixed interest rate and received $165,000. I was able to put back in my pocket my cost of the remodel. 


I have lived here since Jan. 10th, 2012, I have never made a house payment, the lien against the home is approx. $625,000 which includes principal borrowed plus accrued interest. Current market value is $1,850,000 


After my wife passed, I began a new career, based on my own experience financing my Retirement Dream Home. 

I now own “Retirement In Reverse” collaborating with Financial Advisors, Insurance, Agents and CPAs as a CFP to enhance their client's retirement plans using Reverse Mortgage Products. 


Planning for the Future: How CFPs Can Guide Clients Through Rightsizing with Confidence


As a Certified Financial Planner, you’ve helped clients prepare for retirement, fund their grandkids’ education, and navigate market shifts. But one topic that often gets overlooked—and yet can have a major financial and emotional impact—is housing. Specifically, helping clients think through when, why, and how they may want or need to rightsize.


Rightsizing isn’t about giving something up—it’s about aligning a living situation with a person’s lifestyle, health needs, and financial goals. And when clients are in or approaching their later years, housing becomes more than just a place to live. It becomes a tool for creating peace of mind, freeing up equity, and ensuring access to care and connection.


Why You Should Start the Conversation Early


It’s human nature to avoid big life changes until they’re absolutely necessary. But waiting until a health crisis or family emergency forces a decision often leads to stress, rushed choices, and greater expense. You can be the voice of reason, helping clients look ahead and explore options on their own terms.

Some clients may want to move closer to family, others may consider downsizing to simplify life or reduce expenses. Still others may want to explore communities with built-in social connections and care services. By addressing this proactively, you can help them understand:


  • What their current home is really costing them (maintenance, utilities, property taxes, accessibility upgrades).

  • Whether their space still matches their lifestyle or future needs (stairs, yard work, isolation).

  • What options exist—from active adult communities to independent or assisted living—and what those choices cost.

  • How to pay for it—including using home equity, retirement income, or a reverse mortgage for purchase.

Your Role as a Trusted Resource


You don’t need to have all the answers—but you do need to ask the right questions:

  • Have you thought about where you want to live 5 or 10 years from now?

  • Would a smaller home or a different location make life easier or more enjoyable?

  • Are you planning to age in place, or would you be open to exploring other living arrangements?

  • If you needed care in the future, how would you pay for it?

Opening the door to these conversations may feel personal, but your clients are likely looking for someone they trust to bring it up. When you do, you’re not just helping them manage money—you’re helping them protect their quality of life.


Aligning Housing Decisions with Financial Planning


Whether it’s unlocking home equity, evaluating long-term care insurance, or helping a couple decide when to sell their family home, your guidance can turn a difficult transition into a thoughtful plan.

And remember—planning doesn’t mean moving today. It means your client has time to explore, visit communities, talk with family, and create a roadmap that fits their vision for the future.




Could This Strategy Benefit Your Clients? Let’s Find Out!

Do any of your clients fit this scenario? Retirement in Reverse would be happy to provide a customized, hypothetical scenario to help you assess if this strategy could be a valuable solution. Let’s explore how we can make it work for your clients!




Who would have ever thought you could use a reverse mortgage for this?

Today’s reverse mortgage is no longer the loan of last resort. It’s a flexible financial tool that can be used strategically for:

  • Charitable giving
  • Buy-sell agreements
  • Paying for long-term care or in-home support
  • Funding a business venture
  • Helping Grandkids Fund College Expense
  • Gift down payment to your Kids
  • Any many more….


It’s all about what the money costs. It’s just math.


Retirement In Reverse offers Objective, Competent Advice to help you make informative decisions for your clients.
Furthermore, we have
No Conflict of Interest, as we do not sell Financial Product, nor enter into financial planning engagements. We share your commitment to your clients’ financial stability and quality of life.



May 30, 2025
What Early Warning Signs of Dementia Should CFPs Be Looking For? As a Certified Financial Planner®, you're not just managing portfolios—you’re often one of the first people to notice when something is off. Subtle behavioral changes may hint at a deeper issue. Are you prepared to recognize the financial warning signs of cognitive decline? The Overlooked Red Flags in Financial Behavior Research shows that financial missteps may precede a formal dementia diagnosis by as much as six years. This is especially true among older adults who live alone. As cognitive ability begins to slip, so does financial judgment—and the signs often show up in your office before they show up in a doctor’s. Watch for these potential early warning signs : Hard to Prevent (But Need to Plan For): Rising care and medical expenses Reduced income due to a client stepping back from work to become a caregiver Potentially Preventable (Cognitive-Related): Missed bill payments, late fees, or declining credit scores Financial mismanagement, such as over-withdrawals or confusing multiple accounts Irregular retirement account contributions or hardship withdrawals Sudden, impulsive investment changes—especially during market downturns New, erratic spending patterns Uncharacteristic interest in "too good to be true" offers or unfamiliar financial products Growing vulnerability to scams or fraud Requests to sell long-term assets at inappropriate times I your client suddenly insists on selling everything at the bottom of a downturn—or makes large financial gifts to new acquaintances—pause. Ask more questions. Review recent financial activity. And most importantly, involve a trusted family member or advisor where appropriate. When a Diagnosis Happens: The Dual Household Challenge One of the most common scenarios you may face: a couple where one partner is diagnosed with dementia and needs full-time memory care. The other wishes to remain at home. This creates a dual-financial burden : Two households to maintain Memory care costs exceeding $10,000/month Little to no tax relief for care expenses Emotional strain leading to rushed decisions—often at the cost of retirement assets Too often, clients react by: Liquidating retirement accounts Tapping into brokerage assets Taking out personal loans or lines of credit These moves can trigger tax liabilities, shrink future income, and complicate estate planning. A Smarter Financial Safety Net: Home Equity as a Pre-Tax Reserve For many older adults, their home is their largest asset—but the most underutilized. Home equity, when accessed strategically, can act as a pre-tax reserve fund that supports long-term care while preserving core retirement assets. A reverse mortgage or reverse second can offer: ✔ Non-taxable access to funds ✔ No monthly repayment requirement ✔ Protection for the healthy spouse to remain in the home ✔ Cash flow continuity—without disturbing invested assets By setting up this reserve before a health crisis, you give your clients options—not ultimatums. How to Start the Conversation These conversations are delicate. Clients may be unaware of their missteps, or even actively trying to hide them. Approach with compassion, and consider involving: Family members Elder law attorneys Geriatric care managers or social workers As a CFP®, you're in a unique position to spot the early signs and steer clients toward a secure and dignified future. Let’s Partner If you’re ready to explore how home equity can support clients facing cognitive decline—or to help prepare long before a diagnosis— we’re here to collaborate . At Retirement In Reverse, we offer objective, competent advice with no conflicts of interest. We don’t sell financial products or manage portfolios—we simply help you protect your clients' long-term stability and quality of life. Let’s talk about solutions. Before the crisis.
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